The Sum of my Jan

Thanks everyone for coming by this month, despite my lack of posting. Today’s blog is about what has been pre-occupying my mind.

I know a lot of you before read that my Grandmother passed away awhile back. My Grandmother has lived with me since I was in the third grade. That was a long long time spent coming home from school and hanging out with her. She was always there, a constant. When it happened, I suppose I was still in the shock of it. While I was very sad, somehow in the back of my mind it hadn’t quite hit me. During Christmas though, it really hit home. I know it seems silly, but its not because of the holiday itself anyways. It’s because my Grandmother’s passion for the greater part of the year was planning a unique decoration for the house and tree. She’d spend weeks baking, then having us put up all of the decorations and then on Christmas Eve, surprise all the random family members with the holiday makeover.

I suppose that is what did it for me. This year’s party was very different, and then, when I went to eat my Uncle’s attempt at making one of her cakes, I kinda lost it. That silly piece of missing cake got me. Its been rough then, since especially her birthday was this month. I’m not to embarrassed to admit my extreme grief this month. If this was paper, pfft, you’d see tear stains, yup…

Anyhow, enough of the emotional cake story. I’m not angry with myself that I’ve pretty much not done any studying, or even immersion. I’m not going to beat myself up over feeling loss. I’m sure a good handful of you out there know what I’m going through, well at least some perhaps. On a positive note, I’ve rearranged some of my house so that I have a space my daughter cannot destroy. I can now put about my Japanese goodness and not worry about papers getting shredded or things torn down. (she’s quite the rampager!).

I’ve also realized that she’s grown a lot more independent in the last few months, which has freed up a lot more time for actual good hard hitting studying. I watched a french film the other day (Heartbreakers). It happened by accident, as I didn’t pay attention and realize it wasn’t in English. The fun thing about it is that, even though its been roughly 6 years since I was working with French, I still understood the basics, and could hear a good portion of words I knew. I’ve put a lot of time into Japanese, so I know my time this month wont kill my Japanese, but looking at my srs is kind of intimidating. I guess I’ll make a game out of it to make it go faster. 😀

Well I must go attend to my cutie pie. Its her food consumption time 😀 I hope that others had much better luck with their ReadMOD contest this month.

2 Responses to “The Sum of my Jan”
  1. Daniel says:

    Bonne chance mon amie!

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  • Read More or Die! 2011

    _2011 End Results_
    Total read for Tadoku:
    __433.3 pages!__
    Placement: 115/188
    October 2011 Contest:
    Placement: 97/120
    End Tally: 59.2
    July 2011 Contest:
    Placement: 86/142
    End Tally: 195.6
    April 2011 Contest:
    Placement: 62/106
    End Tally: 154.5
    January 2011 Contest:
    Placement: 84/99
    End Tally: 24
    August 2010 Contest:
    Placement: 20/41
    End Tally: 160

  • Read Or Die 2013

    Goal: 600
    Total: 906.26
    blew my goal outta the water!

    March 2-Week:
    Goal: 125

    Goal: 250
    Total: 314

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